Becoming confident in dating for online dating site
The blank canvas of this new locale might be just what you need to make things happen for you.
The Road to Confidence in Dating, Step Four: Entering Confidently One point we’re always trying to hammer home here at The Art of Charm is that if you act confidently, people will treat you like a confident man, which will in turn make you feel more confident, which makes it easier for you to behave confidently.
So while my IMPULSE might be to complain that my magazine was not getting the proper resources, my ACTION would be to remain appreciative and try to illustrate how content can better drive traffic and create revenue. If you know that you scare guys off with your intensity, the only answer is to STOP BEING SO INTENSE. You may still be the intense questioner who wants to lock down her boyfriend for life the instant you feel a lapse in your connection…
but hopefully, by being patient, being cool, and being positive, you’ll create a feeling in your boyfriend that he’s LUCKY to have found such a rare and amazing woman.
I tend to be the confident, self-assured woman in the dating process, but once I begin the courtship/relationship phase, I become unconfident and clingy. It was called JMag and it was to be patterned after Match.com’s Happen Magazine, where I was a contributor. I had no paid writers, no dedicated graphic designers. I complained to anyone who would listen that JMag was underfunded and underappreciated. Less talented people who knew those things are already at the top of the totem pole. You succeed because you make a good choice in a partner AND because you know how to deal in relating to that partner. Getting the RIGHT guy and making the RIGHT decisions is what determines whether you have a future.
In my head I see what I’m doing, but I have been unable to change this flaw of mine, even though I know it’s happening. JDate promised me that I was to be the editor-in-chief and advice columnist at JMag. Just me, trying to wrangle something amazing out of piecemeal resources. Because you can be the PERFECT girlfriend to the WRONG guy and there’s NOTHING you can do to salvage the relationship.
My perspective encourages men to be active and assertive.
BUT, I could relate to the clinginess in relationships. I constantly go back to it on your website, and I’m glad you included it in your book. Obviously, the message in “Why He Disappeared” can’t apply in equal measure to every unique woman who’s read it, but I’m glad you saw enough universal truth that fits your situation. I was hired to create a magazine for JDate back in 2005. Finally, I was coming in 1 day a week to work on JMag. I may be able to get hired based on my resume, intelligence and work ethic, but if I were really to ascend in a corporate environment, I’d have to do a LOT better at those tasks. You don’t succeed because you’re cute, smart, successful, and fun.For those who do not know, Rebecca Watson is a feminist skeptic who recently blogged about an experience she had while speaking at a conference in Ireland.Apparently, a fellow conference attendant attempted to ask her out in an elevator for coffee at 4am (in a shy, "geeky" manner).And you can be an AWFUL girlfriend to another guy, and the relationship may persist. The point is, Kelly, that there’s no magic formula to teach you exactly what to say and do in the context of a relationship to avoid being needy and clingy.I think it’s a matter of seeing what works and what doesn’t, and doing more of what works and less of what doesn’t.